caring, sharing and having hope

I am dedicating this post to the Uniboob Club!! Taking my lead from Cliff over at WIXY's Gone Bananas, he does such a great job introducing bloggers, I want to comment on how beautiful this Blog by Cristina is.

First off as many of you may already know, my mother died of cancer and I watched her weather away to nothing from this horrible disease. Cancer sucks. What Christina has done is not only create the most beautiful dedication blog about cancer, she has made it so that the family members of survivors and hero's have a place where they can tell their story.

I gotta tell you, when I first started blogging I had no idea how powerful this wonderful tool really is, until I came into this world, my world was so much smaller. i feel so very connected and that I have a voice and that I have people who have common interests and hobbies and there is a connection here that I never knew existed. The last post I read from The Uniboob Club, was about a woman who had lost her battle with lung cancer, the same as mom, but the story is told by her daughter and her husband and I could just hear them both sharing their story as I read along and it is so heartfelt and wonderful. If you get a chance stop on by just click one of my links to Christina's Blog or click on my blog roll link to the left of my blog. Have a read watch the home video and leave some words of encouragement, as they are so very helpful and welcome in this community. Thanks for reading and to those who leave me comments, I really love everything you have to say today's thought;"I am more and more convinced that our happiness or unhappiness depends more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves."
--Alexander Humboldt

snow and finances

We Got SNOW!!! Wow what a beautiful day!!. I think i lost my bell peppers, they haven't spouted yet and some of my tomatoes have not either, but my kitchen sprouter just arrived and I am growing fresh sprouts all day!!
We just turned out our lights for earth hour and then I plugged in online to watch the dramatic skylines all over the world go dark!! What an amazing thing to be a part of, next year i will contact the democratic party in Sedgwick county to get involvement there!!
I will be planting more peppers, i just started some rainbow bells, so I will redo the green ones. I was told not to get discouraged and just try again so that is what I am doing, they aren't going anywhere for a while since the ground is covered in ice and snow!!! I did not hear any thunder though. My girls and I went outside to try to make snow angels it was so much fun they threw snowballs till their little noses started running then the only way of getting them in the house was to get them in the bath tub immediately.
We spent the earlier part of the day in the blizzard, shopping. Groceries don't last as long when you are buying primarily produce. And it is so hard on a budget. We have been listening to suze orman and we are building our savings and it means cutting back on so much, my "A" just earned over 80 buck in babysitting last month and then we just found out we need to pay an extra 50 bucks for her soccer games. It is an athletic charge if your high school student is playing sports, this is the cost. Well my girl asks me if she is going to need to pay the 50 bucks herself and my honey says Maybe. This completely mortified me. I hate not having an income. And on top of that who am I to ask to pay for a sitter 3X's a week so I can go do some tutorials from Libby hen we can't even afford to pay my own daughter!! So on top of that I took some items off the grocery list that I wanted to get because i was not going to take away from my daughter. It is just so hard when everything is costing so damn much and there is a squeeze on everything and more money keeps going out and not enough is coming in.
So this is a little bit of something that is eating my lunch. I feel so powerless and where do I draw the line. i mean I know it is what is best for the family but my emotions are eating me up about being a taker from my own family. It is very humbling to not be contributing a paycheck to your family, i know some of my friends have been laid off and it may be a while before they work. but there are times, and I know this is my shit, that it feels like i am being judged for living off of somebody else, not being an independent woman who takes care of her kids without a man. Then they will come in and say "well i know how you feel i just got laid off myself." Then my addict in me says "the hell you do I haven't had a job in 4 years!!" you know it is one thing to not have a job in a few months but to have had a great paying job with benefits I might add. The only thing I could do was wear low hanging shirts, tight jeans and let grabby drunken assholes grab me for a buck!! So not only am i not working but i have no skills to get a job that would be worth getting to pay for a decent sitter!! Even if i got a job paying 10 bucks an hour, I would have to hire a sitter at 4 bucks an hour per kid!! Do the math. And I go through this feeling every time I have to say no to my child who deserves a yes. I still don't know if we have the 50 bucks for sports, and we discussed her excess babysitting and there was the convention, but then I was like then how do I justify paying someone else to watch my babies!! quite a vicious cycle my little addict puts me through. I am so very grateful for everyone out there who cares so much about others.
I am so very grateful today that all that shit I just put down in my blog did not come out of my mouth today. you know i know it is just life on life's terms and 2 years ago I couldn't even look at my debt let alone talk about paying it off. pride is a nasty little hidden defect sometimes. today I pull out my bills we discuss insurance and other things like how to spend money and how to save money. I am very proud of the fact that I have less than 700 in bad debt, it used to be much higher and I am close to paying it off. I have about 8000 in student loans that are in deferment and asap I will be putting that in good standing to get a better FICO score. it is just that sometimes the real part, you know the moment where you need to decide is something a necessity or a want, sucks. and for this little addict my mind goes there. I am grateful that i can process these thoughts today in a loving a caring manner both to myself and my family.
I read a lot of blogs of family members of addicts and see them straining to understand or ask themselves "why", "was there something we could have done different?". you know the answer to the latter is no. As for the why, some things aren't meant to be known just accepted. for an addict our thought process is f***** up. the thoughts i just shared about the finances and the trigger of what put me in a bad space seems so amplified to the common human, "earthlings" as we call them. but those thoughts are running like bumper cars through at least this little addicts brain all the time, and the only serenity i find is in the program and I try to share this with others. I never had a piece of mind before. it was more like a squishy lump of goo that wouldn't stay in shape and it kept me running like crazy, the only thing that would make it stop moving was dope. but that stopped even the good feelings, today I want to keep the good so I have to deal with the bad as well i am grateful for my tools today, today i choose life. for my thought;"Older and wiser voices can always help you find the right path, if you are only willing to listen." --Jimmy Buffet
Thanks to all my voices who help guide me today!!

Weather Watch

Hello out there is bloggerville!! This is your Wichita weather report. Forecasters are calling for snow, lots of snow. I just googled wunderground.com and saw a big blue cloud on the radar!! So i am looking out my window and guess what, no snow!! We are told to watch for thunder snow!! Look I caught an angel in the sky!! I have never heard of thunder snow.
Empty promises are so boring!! I have been wanting to see some snow all winter, of course if we do get hit this means we will need to re-rototiller the land, but I am OK with that, I see this as God working in my favor. See a lot of other local gardeners have already started planting and have lost some crop, I know this is not good, but I have almost 200 seedlings in my mock greenhouse that are not ready to plant yet, and my teacher told me that gardeners share, so I will be sharing my crop, if it grows, with others. My little cucumbers are so cute and so are my squash!! They have strong little stalks growing up!! All my lettuces are growing along with my spinach!! Do you pick spinach young and that's why they call it baby spinach or is baby spinach an actual breed? And how do you create a male and female plant for pollination?
So the big news in Wichita is this huge storm coming out of Colorado. Wes tells me that they closed down the Denver office, where he works, and that I-70 has been closed since yesterday. We haven't had any winter weather this year so it would be good for the spring crops to get some moisture.
Oh my lessons are going wonderfully, I have been practicing my retouches and I am going to go to kelbytraining.com to watch all the free tutorials they have available. I don't go back until Tuesday so Libby, my wonderful teacher in photoshop, said if I go through all the tutorials and want to learn more to give her a call and she will give me her account info so I can watch the ones she has already paid for. She started me with the photoshop simplified DVD yesterday and I already have learned so much more than I did before.
So I can shave a man in a picture without a real razor!! I can remove bags from your eyes and make your double chin go away!! I can brighten eyes and create fresh sparkles in them i just need to get faster at the retouches. I do not have a wacom tablet, it is a bamboo, but it is great for beginners. Oh and I learned that the MAC is way different then a PC. It was so funny, yesterday I was watching the tutorial by Ed Peirce, and he was talking about calibrating the monitors and I touched the wacom pad and my photoshop closed down!! There was not any reason so i clicked it back on and my pictures I was working on stayed in place, but the program was gone. Then I noticed when the program was running that you could see the desktop right through the program!! It was so weird, you MAC users are laughing right now and I am sure my PC buddies are like "what?" Well get this I press pause on my tutorial and tell Libby we really need to figure out what is wrong with your MAC because only part of the photoshop is showing up. Libby said she was going to call someone who knew how to work on MAC, I said I will call Wes. So I get him on the phone and explain what is going on and that the background screen for the photoshop program is not working and there was some "finder bar at the top of the screen and there were not even any "open", "minimize", or "close" buttons in the upper left hand program of the screen. This is where Wes explains to me, this is a MAC and that is how they work, it is slightly different from a PC but it is perfectly normal, just takes some getting used to!!
Then before i hung up with him he tells me to tell Libby it would be $82.50 for the consultation call!!
So now i am taking MAC tutorials from Wes and Photoshop tutorials from Libby, she has an endless library of learning and has no issue with training me. I am so truly blessed today. Wes is working from home today and just came out to see some snow, but it is just windy and cloudy. I will bring my trays in tonight before we go to bed so they are safe. I have a little space heater that I borrowed from Paula that has been doing great keeping them warm, we are just going to bring them in to be safe.
I want to grow strawberries but i think I may need to order them from Johnny's because they had some at Atwoods but the batch froze, and I don't know how old they are, I have a Johnny s catalog that is advertising they have 18 month old strawberry plants, which would give me berries this year!! You know us addicts, we want what we want when we want them!! I cannot grow blueberries because the PH level in my soil is about 6.5 and that is supposed to be no higher than a 5. So we are going to compost and that should be good for my soil but I do not foresee me having the time to try to bring the PH level any lower, this is my first time doing anything like this.
Well it is early still and i have some silver dollar pancakes cooking for my girls, they want johnny cakes but I am out of honey, so whole wheat silver dollars will have to do. Still no snow in Wichita Kansas , but it is early, i hope for some but the storms always seem to pass us we get snow to the immediate north and south of us but now on us. More will be revealed for today's thought; I've always believed in the idea that each of us has a particular place in the universe where we belong, and that if we find it everything will fall into place and we will flourish. —Patrick O'Connell, chef

Well today was very humbling, and I had so much fun. I knew I didn't know enough about photo retouch to have a job. The thing is this wonderful woman is willing to train me. It is very sweet of her, my first mistake was when she saw me do a resize, it was wrong. Then she asked how did i whiten the teeth on her bride and I told her i used the dodge tool, that was what my teacher had taught me, that was wrong. She said you do not use the dodge tool for teeth. Oh. I did not get upset and the great thing was that neither did she. It was like she was totally ok with me not knowing, and i don't know why, but she has all the training you could get at a college right there at her finger tips and she is willing to share. So i started training today. I go back in the morning for more basic training. It was kind of funny because she said to do quick retouches to get the order ready for proofing. So i went to upload the pictures and the first thing i did was ask, how do you upload on a MAC? Not familiar, well neither is she!!! She has 3 computers sitting there, a brand new MAC with a 24 inch screen and doesn't know how to use it, she wants to train me on it. Then she says I can show her how the MAC works!! Crazy fun!! So i did 2 hours of tutorials and notes and came home to practice, I suck. But I am going to keep trying because i believe my higher power has a plan and i don't need to know what that is today I just need to go with the flow. And I really want to learn this stuff!!
It is Wednesday so I need a list of gratitude:
1. I am grateful for being teachable today.
2. I am grateful for Wes willing to spend money on a sitter so I can be schooled.
3. I am grateful I am clean today.
4. I am grateful I got to hear Andy speak again.
5. I am grateful I got to hug my friend Sarah, and that the prayers worked for her.
6. I am grateful for that moment of silence for the still suffering addict at the beginning of every meeting. It got me in the rooms.
7. I am grateful for my garden I am learning to grow.
8. I am grateful that my family is healthy today.
9. I am grateful for bubble baths.
10. I am grateful for Earth Hour this Saturday!!! 8:30pm local time!!
11. I am grateful for the smiles and giggles that fill my house today.
There are so many wonderful things to be grateful for today, I remember growing up in a house of screams. That was communication in my house. Today we talk to each other with respect and I am grateful for that. The joy i get from the thought of coming home is overwhelming. I do wish i could upload some pictures of my plants and back yard but I think the memory on this little PC is full so it will have to wait until my Wes can get to it. We are getting a load of compost on Saturday and the weatherman is expecting snow!! Good thing the little heater works on my green house and I haven't planted yet!! I am grateful for that!! What are you grateful for today? My thought:"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved -loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves."

--Victor Hugo

Blogs, Gardens and work

Time, time, time does anyone have it anymore? I go over to Cliff and read up and see he has not missed many posts, yet where do you find the time? Cliff of "Gone Bananas" is amazing and has a wonderful way of introducing bloggers to the community. Like Busy Bee Sue, we share the same name so I am an instant fan, and Sue is a mother and has a lot on her plate as well, where do you find the time to write such a great blog!! Priorities I guess, while I am learning to blog I am also learning a new job and planting a garden!!
Yes I went to work tonight and it was great fun, also I have never ever gardened in my life, so talk about going from zero to 160 in nothing flat. I have an 18X31 foot plot to plan. I have 170 baby seeds growing. Actually I have planted in rows of 5 in little starter trays and like with the tomatoes I have 3 different types with 5 each going also I have 2 varieties of spinach. When you want baby spinach do you just harvest it earlier? And does anyone know what "bolting" means. I am going to plant an herb garden in the front flower box in front of the house, the garden is in the back and ooohh I almost forgot this is an organic garden so I need to plant something called an insectary!! I just downloaded this deal of plants that attracts beneficial bugs so I will also have a pretty colorful garden with little flowers in it. Can you believe all my plants, they are really growing too!! it is so cool, I never grew anything in my life, not even pot in my using days. So instead of using insecticides I know a lot of people who started gardens and told me about bugs coming and destroying their crops so they planted these other plants, after the fact so the next year they wouldn't have that issue, but the frugal girl I am I said I would just plant the good plants now and hopefully not lose any veggies. We are trying to save money after all.
I am open to any and all suggestions anyone has as far as gardening goes, i hope i have enough space for all my veggies oh and we ordered a sprouter today!! yeah us, i love sprouts we made some mung bean, lentil and alfalfa sprouts and they were wonderful. We have also been making a lot of slaw and the first one i made oh it was funny because I am used to the usual cole slaw with cabbage, carrots and pineapple and i think it may have a mayonnaise on it but we were looking on raw food dot com and i had this big blue bowl just filled with vegetables and my old food processor ready to go. I told Wes to look up a good recipe and I was just sitting there waiting so I said OK I am just going to start chopping. So I chopped cabbage, then I put in some zuchini then I put in some radishes then some carrots, then I had to empty the bowl. Then I put in some celery then some green peppers. Then I stopped because i had this huge bowl of colorful stuff and he said what's that?
I was like I don't know but it looks good, so I mixed it up and tried some dry and it was really good!! So we found a dressing recipe that had olive oil, honey, lemon juice, fresh grated ginger and salt and pepper to taste. Yum!! So this whole going green raw thing is pretty good but I did just eat a bowl of Cheerios. I did start using Suconate instead of white sugar, this is just dehydrated cane juice, or unprocessed sugar.
So i need to cut this short so I have time to visit a few folks, and add my links because i have to be to work in the morning!!! Can you believe it I am going to "work"!!!! It has been 4 years y'all and I don't even know how this is happening other than blind faith. So for todays thought; "Only those who see the invisible can accomplish the impossible."

Grateful, Recovering Addict

Has it really been this long. I haven't posted in over a week. I haven't even had time to read up on all my buddies out there and I feel a little left out of the loop. Hopefully i can catch up on some reading this week and catch everyone up on me in the next couple of days.
Wow the Convention was an absolute amazing adventure. I was so in awe at everybody wearing my artwork and seeing the HUGE banner with my work on it was so very humbling and just truly amazing. I worked all weekend selling my merchandise for the Convention. I say "my" because I designed everything!!! I know this blog is not very humble but I am not used to having any success in my work. I mean I am always so critical of me and I have never seen so many people looking at what I created and appreciating it. The shirts sold out!! There were over 500 registered addicts at this little event and I don't know how many that didn't get to register. With the people that filled out their clean time we counted 2850 years and 8 days of clean time at the convention!!
Speakers were fabulous I am so pumped with recovery I am so grateful I had so much fun visiting with everybody I feel like I made 500 new friends!! I think I have had 5 hours of sleep in 5 days it has been C-R-A-Z-Y FUN!!!
My little sweet girls need me now they haven't seen me in 3 days.

Last week we rototillered the backyard up, we thought to rent one would be about 25 bucks and it was 80. I have little baby radishes growing up and I have little seedlings coming and i am so excited I will load up some pictures of this and the convention soon.

It was so much fun, picture about 600 addicts and about 100 "Ex- Winos" at the Hilton for 3 Days!! We really had a great event and I think "earthlings" really saw something special in us and it was beautiful!!

Imagine the picture above about 6 foot by 8 foot big!! That was my design for MARCNA!! I think I will be taking a break from convention this year and work on my recovery cards and pictures to raise money for literature racks in the treatment facilities around town.

OK enough excitement for now todays thought: SPREAD THE WORD! Tell your friends, colleagues and family members to sign up on the Earth Hour website so we can count their Vote for our Earth! Details for taking part in this historic call for global action on climate change can be found at www.EarthHourUS.org.

Gratitude Wednesday and pirates

little angels everywhere are all around and fun to catch. they like to play in gardens and sleep on flowers. this is what i told my daughters today, they can't wait for our garden to grow and bring the little angels from everywhere.

it is so much fun playing with two little ones and it is amazing how much they absorb on a daily basis, did you know my jillybean believes that if she pushes hard enough she will push over the big old elm tree in our front yard. and pirates go "aargg".

so while i am feeling better i still have some anxiety about the future. now my oldest "a" wants to go out on a date saturday night with her new boyfriend who is 17, has a truck and a job, which is more than a whole bunch of people i know. again he is 17, has a truck and a job, i don't think this is a bad thing it is just not good for my anxiety that my daughter wants to go out on a date with him. did i mention my daughter is 15 and this would be her first real date. she has had boyfriends before and the thing was when she said she was going "out" with them, they never technically went out. i remember when she believed in santa claus. i remember when she was jills age and we were asleep she woke up early and tried to make mommy and daddy breakfast in bed. she was so smart. still is, anyway she brought in the tub of butter from the fridge the loaf of bread from the table and the cinnamon/sugar mix and when captain stupid and i woke up she had butter and sugar all over the bedspread, in her pigtails and it was so sweet. now she wants to go out with this boy who has a truck. and when she goes haley and the bean and i will wait by the window for the fairies to put on their night lites and bring the flowers to the beds. we may even blow some magic bubbles to stay just like this for a little while longer. i want to hold on to every moment.

today is wednesday and this is my gratitude list;
1. i am grateful for the fairies that bring a smile to my little girls faces.
2. i am grateful for the wonder in thier eyes as they wait for santa claus.
3. i am grateful for my mommy who taught me how to believe in santa claus.
4. i am grateful for my health today and the fact that i do not have cancer.
5. i am grateful for my health insurance, that i did not have before.
6. i am grateful for my recovery and the tools to get out of the funk.
7. i am grateful for my ability to be honest and to fight denial.
8. i am grateful for pirates that go "aarrgg".
9. i am grateful for the rainbows that float in bubbles.
10. i am grateful for this blog and my new found friends that always stop by and say hi.
11. i am grateful to plug earth hour and the excitement of people joining for a great cause.
what are you grateful for today, is it little, big or imaginary, it doesn't matter what you are grateful for, just that you are grateful. todays thought; "Whatever my accomplishments, all of the things I loved in life, were rooted in the dreams and goals I had as a child..." The late Randy Pausch. Exerpt from page 13 of "The Last Lecture" Today I am a Tigger.

rambling thoughts

do you ever feel sad for no apparent reason?sometimes i feel like i am doing great then i make plans for the next day and when i wake up i feel different. yesterday i finally got back to the gym and i felt good, got a lot of work done. today, not so good.

these flowers i got for mom on her last birthday, i really over did it but i wanted her to be able to wake up to something pretty, she died four days after her birthday, i don't know if she even knew they were there.

last week i got into a fight with my honey. i was so mad that i turned off my computer, tornado sirens going off i need to check the weather.... just a drill, nice of the city to say they were going to do a tornado drill on a cloudy day!!! usually, here in wichita they test the sirens on mondays at noon, if there is no severe weather. today is tuesday so it kind of scared me to hear them go off. so where was i oh yes the anger demon... i was angry all day on friday and i turned off my computer, unplugged my phone and sat here and took down all my pictures off the wall and planned to leave. i packed a bag and was ready to i don't know what, maybe move into a hotel room for a couple of days. obviously i did not do that i am still here. i have low self esteem i figured that one out. the fight was due to laundry not getting done and he had no work clothes. i did not know he was out of laundry and felt real bad about it so bad that i decided i would move out before he kicked me out. i have another issue, i have no sense of security here. i do not have a job or any income of my own and haven't sense i have been clean. it is hard to separate the past and the present sometimes and to exert a little faith when a loved one is venting that is all they are doing, venting.
i went right back in my head to captain stupid and the myriad of fights he would create just to berate or hit me. in that relationship i worked he did not. he got all the money and spent it as he saw fit. ( by the way i am giving up on capitalizing my letters, i hate it when my i's are not capitalized and this will save me some time going back and fixing that)
not to change the subject but i believe that low self esteem is a character defect and it is rearing it's pretty little head right at me. i don't like it when i don't like myself. i work really hard on this. i am working on having financial security at this time and i know i cannot expect to get a job in this economy, but let's face it we are not married and this bothers me that i could lose my home. he has never, ever said anything of that sort but i still don't feel secure sometimes and i don't like that feeling.

i really love my life today and i don't know why i am trying to complicate it with these stupid feelings. it is like i am trying to sabbotage myself. i mean really if i left where would i go? my parents are both dead, my sister is a nut with lots of chaos that i cannot handle and my brother, my older brother, lives in financial dire straights in arizona. i really have no one i would actually stay with nor would i want to i do not want to live in someone else's chaotic house. this is my home and i sometimes try to push myself out of it because of some feelings triggered by some angry words.

the last few days i have noticed a significant drop in comments to my blog and so i haven't posted anything real, except earth hour, i am really excited about that i wonder what it will be like if 1 billion people shut off their lights at the same time for an entire hour. that will be something. so with this vast clutter of thoughts raging through my head it is just a sure tale sign that even after 4 years clean i am still an addict and i still need this fellowship and i do not need to isolate. i did go to a meeting that night and shared about my isolation, it was a great meeting.

i have to go and do some more work now, we are making a garden in our back yard, trying to eat healthier, i will take some before and after pictures to show the progress. we will be renting a rototiller on monday to work the backyard. i have a tray of cilantro seeds growing and i also have some pea shoots sprouting. i have a great list of veggies i want to plant and a dear friend of mine is going to help me get this going. this is another reason for feeling overwhelmed i just gave myself more chores to do and i need more help from my family to keep this all in order.
todays thought;

“The steps are our solution. They are our survival kit. They are our defense against addiction, a deadly disease. Our steps are the principles that make our recovery possible.”

Basic Text, p. 19

Just for today:

I want everything my personal program has to offer. I will work the steps for myself.

just for today daily meditation book march 10th

Earth Hour

This is something I just signed up for. On March 28, 2009 at 8:30pm I am going to turn off my lights for one hour. This is a global event and millions of people have already signed up to shut off their lights to show how committed the people are to stop global warming. So far most of us, in America, have not actually seen the effects of global warming. I know a lot of Republicans who believed in the great "Decider" when he said there is no such thing as global warming. I am grateful today that my eyes are open and that I do read the news, good and bad I read the news and keep up on current events. I no longer turn a blind eye to the fact that we are losing our polar ice caps that have been here for millions of years. Millions of years, and the carbon footprint we all put out is melting them!! I know politics is a touchy subject for some people and I have friends who believe that Barack Obama will bring about the end of civilization as we know it. Well I know enough today to know that one person is not the cause of all our problems. Thinking like that is addict thinking. Blame is not a solution so today I try to focus on Solutions rather than the cause of the problems. So one thing we need to do is realize that everyone of us has the right to live on this planet and everyone of us has an equal responsibility to do what we can to preserve where we live. It is just like cleaning house, you wouldn't let your toilet get spoiled with mold in the rings would you? You do what is necessary for the clean up and how to preserve your home for your childrens health. The earth is everybodys home and we all need to do what we can which includes simple things like recycling, using environmentally friendly cleaners, growing gardens and sharing. learning to grow food and give back instead of always going to the store and taking commercialized process food is such a wonderful way to give back. I know that last sentence makes me sound fruity but I am not talking about drastic changes just start small, switch out light bulbs to the energy efficient ones. Turn off the computer at night and check and make sure you turn off lights when you leave a room, not only does it save money, it saves energy. Here is an easy one, if you only need a couple of things from the store ride a bike instead of driving save some fuel. And if you are interested in Earth Hour just click on the links and sign up, then you will get reminders as to when you will be turning off the lights in your area. If we sign up one billion people to turn off their lights on March 28th for just one hour, that will show the law makers that we do believe this planet is in global warming and we are willing to step up and do what we can to fix it. Just go to Earth Hour.org and sign up. It is a very cool deal. Todays thought;"Set up as an ideal the facing of reality as honestly and as cheerfully as possible."--Dr. Karl Menninger

Just some good ol' Laughs

This is why women should Not take men shopping against theirwill. After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany
her on her trips to Wal-Mart.
Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping
boring and preferred to get in and get out.
Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women -
she loved to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter
from the local Wal-Mart:

Dear Mrs. Samsel,

Over the past six months, your husband has
been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot
tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban BOTH of
you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Samsel are
listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and
randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't
looking.

2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in
Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an
employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in
Housewares. Get on it right away.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of
M&M's on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted
area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told
other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring
pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him, he
began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave
me alone?'

9. September 4: Looked right into the
security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his
nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the
hunting department, he asked the clerk where the
antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around
the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission
Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto
department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using
different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18:
Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an
announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal
position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES
AGAIN!'

And last, but not least .

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room,
shut the door, waited awhile,
then yelled very loudly,
'Hey! There's no toilet paper in
here!'
Thought for today; Scrubbing a Toilet.....


This was simply too much of a timesaver not to share it
with you.

1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet
shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him
towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and
close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never
mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is
actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a
'power-wash' and rinse'.

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be
sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the
front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly
lift the lid.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through
the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.


9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean..



Sincerely,
The Dog

Gratitude Wednesday

Wow it feels like a month since my last posting. I have finished most of my service work, I really need to get down to the t-shirt place and check on my order for the convention but guess what? Still no car! Can you believe this I am just beside myself, I don't know what to think. Oh and I lost a sponsee as well so this is just something I really need to surrender.
Sometimes things happen and you learn real quick the lesson life is trying to teach you other times it is like you are in the remedial program. I don't remember praying for patience.
Of course my sleepover was wonderful I sat up until 2 in the morning talking with some of the most wonderful women recovery has to offer. Very spiritual, I was able to spend some time with Sara and talk about the loss of her baby and how she is doing. It was such an honor to be there amongst so many powerful recovering women that I am filled with gratitude. And here we are on Gratitude Wednesday again!! It has been awhile so for todays gratitude list;
1. I am grateful for the sound of my home filled with the giggles of two toddlers.
2. I am grateful for the gift of open mindedness and being teachable today.
3. I am grateful for the opportunity to learn more about computer graphics, and even though I can not draw my art I can still be an artist.
4. I am grateful for the tolerance to love people where they are at.
5. I am grateful for not allowing myself to feel judged by other addicts. This is a new concept for me and I like it.
6. I am grateful for the grass fed beef in my freezer!!! BEEF it's what's for dinner!!!
7. I am grateful for my health and being able to make conscious decisions about what I eat today.
8. I am grateful I do not have diabetes!!
9. I am grateful that I do not have to live the lie of addiction today.
10. I am grateful for being home to take care of my children and just being able to love them everyday.
Today's thought; "Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be.
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."--Grouch Marx
What are you grateful for today?