Thursday, July 21, 2011

it's been a while, just some giggles

these are too funny not to pass along; notes from the edge of the world....

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the Arc wasn't leaving until 5.
Sincerely,
the Unicorns
~~~~

Dear Twilight Fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead they have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic

~~~~


Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about global warming. Karma's a bitch.
Sincerely,
The Titanic
~~~~

Dear America ,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada 
~~~~
Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely,
Google 
~~~~
Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?!
Sincerely,
1985 
~~~~
Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea... Just kidding! They're all dead.
Sincerely,
BP 
~~~~
Dear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring around it.
Sincerely,
God 
~~~~
Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
Sincerely,
Stevie Wonder 
~~~~
Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely,
Black people 
~~~~
Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain.....no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin 
~~~~
Dear Osama Bin Laden,
Marco....
Sincerely,
United States 
~~~~
Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son's virginity.
Sincerely,
Parents Everywhere 
~~~~
Dear Batman,
What was your power again?
Sincerely,
Superman 
~~~~
Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies 
~~~~
Dear Ugly People,
You're welcome.
Sincerely,
Alcohol 
~~~~
Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendars end there because some Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The Mayans 
~~~~
Dear White People,
Don't you just hate immigrants?
Sincerely,
Native Americans 
~~~~
Dear iPhone,
Please stop spell checking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut. Sincerely,
Every iPhone User 
~~~~
Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up...
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore 
~~~~
Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely, 
Elephant
 
Thanks for sticking around everyone, will post more after move to new home on August 5!!