Waz up?

11:18pm monday evening in the wichita metro area and a cool 50 degrees with clear skies! hows the weather in your neighborhood? honestly i tell ya, i just can't believe the roller coaster and it won't stop!! i tried the emergency brake and the lever broke!! i am just RUNNING like a chicken with my head cut off!!

wow so the surveyor came by on friday ant i totally wasn't ready, i knew it i just wouldn't surrender. i needed to let her come out and write down what i had left to do so i could fix it. instead i am going around just like a lunatic with a toothbrush cleaning every nook and cranny, like she cares about crannies? i mean what the hell is a cranny anyway, i don't know but they're clean i tell ya if they are in this house they are clean.

so she does the walk through, relatively painless, my bathroom was a major problem. ok so i stopped buying wipes, you know I am trying to save the freaken planet here, well the health department don't care about no planet see, what they care about is sanitation stations!! and wipes for the kids to be sterile in the house they are in. when it is your own private home you can germ it up all you want and lysol don't count. when your home becomes a facility for the public it needs to be up to code missy. so i need a paper towel station to wash their hands and dry them, kids cannot share the same towel hanging from the bathroom door to wipe their clean hands on, it will contaminate them. then i need to clear out the cabinet above the sink. it has make up and little tweezers they can hurt them selves on. or i can install tot locks on to the bathroom cabinet, have you ever installed a tot lock? you tube a video for it sometime, they are a pain in the butt!! the guy on the video has these nice cabinets especially made for the video to make installation look easy. try it on 50 year old cabinets!! you gotta drill a hole in the cabinet because they are so thick the magnets don't reach through!!

ok and there was the debris in the back yard, which is actually a blessing to remove because it has been on the 'honey do' list for a year now. so he did it!!

paper work, paper work, paperwork!! i needed 3 tb test 2 hep-a vaccinations, 2 parent release forms, 2 emergency contact forms filled out, a new disaster plan, ('what like this wasn't working?') a posted discipline policy, the one in the contract rocks it just needs to be on the bulletin board?!? a list of local hospitals 2 more hours of training a refrigerator medication lock box 2 new garbage cans and a partridge in a pear tree!! boy you'd think i was trying to open a daycare or something huh? all this by next friday, this friday again!!

so on friday i went in with my girls for their hep a and to get a copy of my tb test, we had them done months ago, the only one we found was Wes's but it had the wrong birthday on 4 copies!! so then i found out the girls needed their 3 and 4 year vaccinations, like how many times have i been to the doctors this year and they don't mention it? ok so haley ended up with two shots and so did the bean, they had my tb on file but A never had hers done, so we came back today and all three girls needed to see the doctor, A needed the tb test, the bean had a very large red thigh, red around the shots!! and hot to the touch, she was allergic to the hep a shot it is a new vaccination the state requires as of August. so now she cannot finish the shots in October and then there was my Haley, who kept getting in trouble for wetting her pants, and i feel just horrible, she had to get 3 more shots, and pee in a cup!! she has a bladder infection!! no wonder she couldn't go potty!! my poor baby all i could do was hold her. i felt like i should have seen this and we were in a few weeks back because i told the doctor she was complaining but the doctor found nothing now a bladder infection!!

so now most of my ducks are falling out of the sky and i am forcing them into this sick little v shape to see if the surveyor will allow daycare, lord do you know what it is like to not make any of your own money for 5 years!!! hey at least it is not 55 years but that is another day! Hah plugged the g-man and i missed flash fiction friday. then today i had the workshop in winfield and we had to check out another house and i had to print off some paperwork i forgot about for the 7 o'clock workshop at 5:30 and now i have a public information presentation on Wednesday at 10:30 am and i am supposed to do the presentation in Spanish!! what the H-E double hockey sticks was i thinking, holy cow!!

oh and did i tell you the mini moos don't count. or wait they do. we were at the WW meeting and i was all jazzed because i lost 3.8 pound last week!! yay me!! and the lady asked what kind of changes did we make and the first thing i blurted out was 'butter'. see i decided to trade out my butter for my coffee, then i heard i could switch out the creamer because it was too many points and when i told the lady i found a 0 point cream she said it is only 0 points for up to 3 cups. excuse me?!? well then i was angry and didn't ask any more questions because i have been using 3 creamers per cup because it is not enough with just 1. but she thought, i think, that i was using 1 per cup and having more then 3 cups a day was going to count as another point. i was pissed because i just spent 8 bucks on creamer from Sams when i had 2 dollar creamer at home with the same point value!! i wasted 8 bucks!! that on top of everything else just took away from my victory, then a miracle happened.

recovery

i have a friend in recovery named Ayed, his name is actually Ayed Q. my name is Suzie Q. yes I was named after the song, the Buddy Holly song and a bet at the race tracks, Quinella is my middle name,(quite a handle huh) took me years to learn to spell my middle name. anyway, i met Ayed at the World convention in San Antonio. he is from Saudi Arabia and he was one of the speakers there, as you can imagine we don't talk much but check in on each other from time to time. My friend sent me some speaker tapes, from WCNA33 in Barcelona, I don't know if he went but I listened, and I calmed down. It was a god shot to hear these strangers I never met tell my story and bring me into some much needed humility.

So I am giving a shout out to all my recovery miracles out there, thank you. no i mean THANK YOU for being there, for praying for me when i couldn't pray for myself, for believing in me when i believed in nothing else for giving me some sanity and freedom, freedom from active addiction. the reason i will continue my service to NA, the fellowship that didn't save my life, it gave me one.

so in case you were wondering, because i haven't been around, what the weather is like here... it is nice and cool and a slight breeze from the south, tomorrow looks beautiful.

thanks to all my peeps for sticking around and giving me comments and awards, i will try to get to them after all this craziness calms down.- Q